View From The Trenches

More than 250 years ago, the Swedish scientist Carl Linnaeus became forever immortalized in botany by establishing a system of plant and animal classification. I hope to achieve my five minutes of fame by trying in this space to classify various types of glass techs that exist out there in our unnatural world.

The Prima Donna: Known for his loud voice and the worn spot on his shirt back where pats must constantly be administered. He is considered your star and his ego needs feeding almost hourly. His speed and mental dexterity is only matched by his own opinion of himself. Often changes nesting areas, but has known to return to locales where he feels most appreciated or dominant. Has difficult time establishing lone habitat due for need for feedback.

The Rookie (aka Cherry): Generally useless unless washing and cleaning vehicles and/or glass. May be trusted with priming duties when glazed look fades from eyes. Is not allowed near tools until considered competent with Nerf cold knife and fitted with Kelvar body suit with an adequate blood supply nearby. Has mysterious attraction to urethane, which he tracks everywhere he touches and is impossible to lose on a job. Develops a symbiotic relationship with Prima Donnas to provide a worship group base.

The BS Artist: This is the species that dazzles during the job interview and tryout. Yet once upon hiring, one quickly realizes why he was looking for work in the first place. Has seemingly difficult time with every assignment. Work orders are unclear, materials faulty, customers difficult to locate. Has extremely variable travel habits; GPS systems have known to fail due to exhaustion in tracking tech.

Rambo: This type is known to have somewhat anti-social tendencies. In idle moments tends to hone tools with personal whetstone. Has a shoulder holster for his Extractor. Not known for chatter with fellow techs or customers. Has been advised that stabbing motions usually are less efficient for utility blade tools. HR-related interviews are usually conducted with witnesses along with a security screening that involves metal detectors.

The Village Idiot: How this type survived the Rook Stage is proof Darwin made mistakes. Loads wrong glass for jobs, continually re-bonds mirror brackets upside down or reversed. Needs string or beans to find his way back to the nest. Source of comic relief to his co-workers and oftentimes is the target of pranks. Has had urethane used to attach several personal articles to unusual areas. Often used to punish Prima Donna by assigning as partners.

The Lawyer: Has a legal reason for not doing work. Either it is unsafe, non-compliant or just too stressful. Can recite state employment guidelines from memory. Has regional OSHA office on speed dial.

The Accountant (Also known as Mr. Flat-Rate): Species knows company pay plans better than company’s treasurer. Has the ability to cherry-pick daily jobs either by time or by locale enabling him ease of making bonus. Knows his exact financial status at any given moment. Questions if pay plan is bolstered when asked to help co-worker with large set. Reverses phone charges when talking to mother.

The Hired Gun: May be a sub-species to both the Prima Donna and The Accountant. Tech follows the money trail to whatever employer will pay him most. This tech is always able to make production targets with ease. However, loyalty to company starts and ends with paycheck. Installation liability from his work surfaces shortly after his departure.

The Sweeney Todd: Your basic butcher. Nothing is safe from this person’s touch. Any tool becomes an instrument of destruction in his hands. Dashboards cry at his approach. Is on speaking terms with every auto painter within a 50-mile radius of shop.

The Pro: Your most dependable employee. Always shows up on time. High CSI along with production. Never sick. Will actually volunteer to help train rookies and new hires. Makes for the wishful thought that cloning was practical.

The Sam Walton: This is the guy that starts a list of your accounts from the very first day of hire. Always has a suggestion to improve bottom line while his use of company supplies seems to dwarf his installs. Has own business cards printed up and his cell phone buzzes with Craigslist shoppers. Habitat control inside shop is needed for his type. Your client list is at risk if exposure takes place.

As reported on glassBYTEs.com™ last week, Don Ableson, formerly of GM, speaking to the sparsely attended NGA glass conference in Tucson, stated: “To succeed as a business today you must have the highest quality and the lowest price.” Don, I believe you must have thought you were speaking to a group of Rolex dealers and not to some of the auto glass industry’s finest.

Somebody please pinch me and tell me that the auto glass replacement business is not a commodity, but still a craft—that the design features of today’s aerodynamic vehicles are dictating that to replace a windshield actually requires special tools, training and, lo, some actual skill. Don, I’d like to challenge you to remove and install a VW Eos within a few hours and leave the vehicle looking like it has never been touched and still water and airtight. The days of FW 173s and DW 847s are long gone. If they weren’t, I’d agree we’d be going the way of tire dealers. Everyone and their brothers would be in the business. (I should amend that statement, because it sure seems there ARE days it looks like everyone is installing auto glass.)

What really gets my goat is the continued movement to render this trade into a production sequence instead of a valued craft. There is nothing more repugnant to the eye than to watch a team of “installers” descend upon a lease return or rental lot like locusts and perform their work. It is just as bad viewing a 30-minute non-priming, cowel jumping, and generic moulding-laden hack work on a city street or corporate parking lot.

I truly believe that production-based bonus programs are a travesty to consumers and quality installs. It starts with CEOs of auto glass corporations and single-point owners that attempt to wring out either for shareholder or personal benefit (usually both) the most out of revenues per unit. That trail of tears ends with most installers trying to maximize their incomes by whatever method available to achieve their bonuses. How can “real” CSI be established, I ask? The customer’s windshield may be cleaned, the vehicle body and interior free of urethane fingerprints yet the actual quality of the install be hidden from view. That fact may never be revealed unless the vehicle is involved in a serious accident or the car is kept long enough to have the effects of corrosion raise its ugly head. Then it becomes far too late to be apologetic. The damage is done and the liability for that starts from a cab of an install van and stretches to inside a corporate boardroom.

Don’t get me wrong; I understand the reasoning behind production bonus plans. However I also see them as a callous attempt of management officials to excuse themselves of responsibility. Ownership recognizes that personnel costs are the biggest barrier to profit so work loads are increased to offset hiring. That makes work habits a very slippery slope to upon which to trod. I will admit, production pay plans are not the sole reason for the deterioration of quality within our industry but they are indeed a factor. The sad thing is that the “leaders” of the industry are champions of this type of remuneration.

I wish I had an answer that could please both sides, but it seems to me that by raising prices thereby increasing profit some sort of compromise could be reached. However, since it is the tradition of this industry to try to forever undercut its competition to gain market share, that route can sadly be dismissed as Quixotic on my part. Perhaps I’ll find another windmill to attack.

On a side note about Tucson, it was interesting to read how few independents showed up “at the show.” Another sign of the times, I guess.

As I watched the finish of this year’s Super Bowl, the outcome again reinforced my stalwart belief that assumptions seem to overshadow events and that nothing is ever certain in life. It’s a lesson that needs to be continually reminded to us as independent glass shops—we are facing large challenges ahead.

Most sport pundits had selected an 18-0 team that was supposed to have better coaching and a better quarterback to win the Super Bowl by a wide margin. Almost everyone including the Las Vegas odds-makers expected the Patriots to win. The strongest team from the strongest conference was, in many people’s minds, already crowned champions. Trouble was, nobody told the Giants. Most importantly, the game had to be played, not prognosticated. As most of the world knows by now, that underdog team won.

One of the most common topics on our glassBYTEs.com™/AGRR Forum is how are we going to compete in the future. Independent shops and mid-size regional chains are facing a very formidable foe and the playing field is nowhere evenly balanced. What gets my goat is the number of posters that woefully complain about “fairness.” Who said life was fair at any stage?

I don’t have any miracle solutions for any of us. I’m not a fan of the “get the job at any cost” school of thought that seems to be an all too prevalent philosophy within our industry. I hope that many of you can see that every TPA or insurance company has used this particular technique successfully against us and that some of our largest corporate production shops are the poster children for this self-destructive mentality. They keep lowering the bar and too many of us rush to leap over it. Even sadder is the fact that elements and “leaders” of our industry are the keepers of the bar.

However, it is no forgone conclusion that our fates are sealed and our days numbered. Are things going to get tougher? Most likely the answer is yes, but again I’ll cite the maxim: “What doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.”

I do believe that hard work, honesty, professionalism, courtesy and a true concern for clients will go a long way in keeping our companies viable. I would also advise on improving one’s business acumen, as knowledge is power. One really needs to ascertain their true operating costs and net profit margins as pricing issues become a ground-zero consideration.

Staying united is a must. So is staying in contact. The extreme division that exists between most independents has been the most exploited weakness that we have and that will continue to be the case unless change occurs. If we had been a strong tight-knit craft, we would not be in the straights that exist today. Associations like the Independent Glass Association, if strongly supported both financially and politically by us, could become the unifiers and a strong shield against some of the most egregious corporate practices that are being inflicted upon us today.

I refuse to wallow in self-pity. I have never signed any agreements with a TPA, nor do I expect to. My toughest competitor is not who you may think it is either. My feeling is that if you keep your head down, you’ll walk into something you wish you hadn’t. This “game” we call work is miles away from being over. Those who wish to concede defeat to large corporate interests are making a mistake. Stop whining and keep your head focused on what you need to do to be a success. As the famous Yogi Berra once said, “It ain’t over until it’s over.”

Folks, it is very, very far from being over.